In 1989, the grindhouse market had become the straight-to-video market. With the change of distribution also came a change in aesthetic. Death Spa is a revived gem of that era where the horror was more comedy than scary, and the movie had an intentional almost-camp that felt totally 80s. The surface of Death Spa seemed to be Chopping Mall goes to a health spa, where a computer goes psycho because of lightning and kills everybody. But, let me tell you, there is a hell of a lot of movie in this little flick.
Chopping Mall was an exercise in minimalism, with horny teenagers being trapped in a mall with psychotic robot security guards intent on killing everybody. Death Spa is an exercise in kitchen sink plotting, with the owner of the health spa being haunted by his dead wife, who had immolated herself after she was paralyzed from the waist down during her pregnancy. The dead wife may or may not be haunting the owner, or her twin brother, who operates the computer that controls the spa, or the computer itself. And, there’s a subplot about the partners simultaneously sabotaging the spa in order to get the insurance money. If your head hurts, realize that’s the plot is revealed cryptically, to the point where the final explanation comes in the last minute of the movie just before the credits roll.
This maximalism is most evidenced by the Motel Hell-inspired title creation, where STARBODY HEALTH SPA, after being struck by lightning, becomes ——D- -EA-TH SPA. To contrast, Motel Hell opened with Motel Hello’s “o” shorting out.
Luckily for the viewer, the kitchen sink mentality extends to the death scenes, like any of the best horror movies. There’s a bit of T&A, but for the most parts the death scenes are definitely more about the death than the exploitation. There’s a lot of death scenes I haven’t seen before, including the pre-Link-to-the-Past idea of tiles spontaneously coming off the wall and flinging themselves at people.
Even though Death Spa drags a little bit in the beginning of the second act, mainly due to dull-as-dishwater detectives, the movie is frequently baffling and hysterical, and the frequency and creativity of the death scenes keep the movie moving along. Michael Fischa fills the frame with all loads of colored lights and 80s neon, creating an hyper-80s mise-en-scene that tickles to the modern eye. The new Gorgon Video blu-ray keeps the colors saturated and almost visceral when they’re needed.
If you’re looking for a silly and frequently moronic horror movie, then Death Spa is right for you. It’s not scary, but, by the end, I’m not entirely sure they were trying to scare but rather to deliver a short but dense compendium of cheap thrills. This is my type of horror comedy, and it might be up your alley.
