Movie theaters candy used to come in boxes for a reason. They’re easy to open, and the only sound they make is the fine rain when you’re pouring out the candy into your hand. The other day, I got a box of M&Ms, and in that box was…a bag of M&Ms. What kind of unholy Matryoshka Doll of packaging is this? The real reason is so that candy doesn’t go stale while waiting to be sold on the shelves, which they do in the boxes.

The problem is: you open the box then have to open a bag, which presents a problem in the midst of a quiet non-Hollywood film. The bags of candy are fucking noisy. Worse are the bags of candy which have candy in the bags that are individually wrapped. An audience member constantly going through a crinkly bag to unwrap a crinkly candy and then noisily suck on the hard candy is almost as bad as a texter in my book. I’m far more distracted by aural stimuli than visual stimuli.

What are your favorite snacky smores for the movie theater? Do you bring in full on dinner, as I’ve seen many people do (I’m talking in a styrofoam box from outside!)? Do you try to bring in quieter bags like plastic baggies rather than the original wrapping? What’s your MO?