“But as far as effort goes: I don’t know what’s between zero and the city-mandated minimum, but from now on, let’s just call that ‘The Billings’.”

Steve Billings, The Shield

“It would be humiliating, having to lie there while the better man refuses to spill your blood. Mercy is the mark of a great man.”
*stab*
“Guess I’m just a good man.”
*stab*
“Well, I’m alright.”

Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly

“You’re not wrong, Walter, you’re just an asshole.”

The Dude, The Big Lebowski

“You know what the first rule of combat is? Shoot them before they shoot you.”

Faye Valentine, Cowboy Bebop

“This is a thousand monkeys working at a thousand typewriters. Soon, they’ll have written the greatest novel known to man! Let’s see… it was the best of times, it was the blurst of times?! You stupid monkey!”

C Montgomery Burns, The Simpsons

“Do not call up that which you cannot put down.”

The Case Of Charles Dexter Ward

“I can’t run anymore! I’ll have to skip!”

Bender Bending Rodriguez, Futurama

“I already confessed, no need to confess again.”

Bob Dylan, “Thunder On The Mountain”

“We’re trying to make a civilisation here, George!”

Jerry Seinfeld, Seinfeld

“This whole raid was as useless as that yellow, lemon-shaped rock over there. Hey, wait a minute. There’s a lemon behind that rock!”

Bart Simpson, The Simpsons

“You wanna be Mayor. All I want is to keep being a cop.”

Vic Mackey, The Shield

“All I’m asking is that we each respect the other’s endgame.”

David Aceveda, The Shield

“It’s hard to be a hypocrite when your guiding philosophy is ‘do whatever’s best for you’.”

Loki, Order Of The Stick

“It ain’t all waitin’ on you. That’s vanity.”

Ellis, No Country For Old Men

“You didn’t have to wound that man.”
“Yeah, I know, it was just funny.”

Lord Warrick and Malcolm Reynolds, Firefly